(At a belated birthday dinner tonight at a Thai restaurant with the parents)
Dad: Maybe I'll have a Thai ice coffee.
Mom: No, you don't want that. That's too sweet.
Dad: Maybe a bubble tea.
Me: I don't know Dad.
Mom: That's too sweet.
Me: It's actually more like desert, like a smoothie.
Dad: Isn't it tea?
Me: No, more like a smoothie - with tapioca balls added.
Mom: Al, you should know more about things.
Waiter: Anyone like anything to drink?
Mom: I'll have a Thai ice coffee.
(Dwight executes his child-of-Asian-parents eye roll)