(At a belated birthday dinner tonight at a Thai restaurant with the parents)

Dad: Maybe I'll have a Thai ice coffee.

Mom: No, you don't want that.  That's too sweet.

Dad: Maybe a bubble tea.

Me: I don't know Dad.

Mom: That's too sweet.

Me: It's actually more like desert, like a smoothie.

Dad: Isn't it tea?

Me: No, more like a smoothie - with tapioca balls added.

Mom: Al, you should know more about things.

Dad: Oh.

(Waiter arrives)

Waiter: Anyone like anything to drink?

Mom: I'll have a Thai ice coffee.

(Dwight executes his child-of-Asian-parents eye roll)